

The star said that she suppressed the romantic side of her and was "embarrassed by it" because her mother, Debra McCurdy, didn't encourage it. Nathan Kress as Freddie and Jennette McCurdy as Sam in season two of "iCarly." Nickelodeon
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I want my first kiss to be a real first kiss, not a kiss for a TV show." I don't want my first kiss to be like this. "My body is saying no, I don't want this. "My mind is saying who cares that this is your first kiss, that your first kiss is on-camera. McCurdy said she "honestly" tried to do what was asked of her, but her body was "stiff" and "unflinching." She continued: "'Move your head around a bit more, Jennette!' The Creator yells from off-camera." It's so odd, staring at a person while your faces are touching. "He's moving his mouth around a bit, but I can't move mine. "Our lips are touching," McCurdy recalled.

The actress said that her nerves were compounded by a man referred to only as " The Creator" yelling at her while shooting. In her memoir, McCurdy said that the scene marked her first kiss, both on screen and in real life. The moment happened after both of them revealed that they hadn't kissed anyone before and decided to get it over with. I had to make these pretty big life decisions in order to deal with my stuff, my life.In the season two episode titled "iKiss," Sam and Freddie kissed for the first time.

In April 2020, McCurdy told Elite Daily her alcohol addiction was one of the main reasons she stepped back from the public eye because she had to "fight the demons on own time." She added, "I went dark.
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I'm literally sitting on a curb and a friend of mine calls me, and he explains to me how to drop a pin, stays on the phone with me until I get back to my hotel in a cab because he wants me to be safe and knows that I'm f**king passing out in cabs," she admitted, sharing she had "no self-esteem, no confidence" and was "lost" without her mom.
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She recalled one particularly rough patch when she was "drunk in the middle of the street in France" while on a work trip. "I was supposed to do a press junket the next day. McCurdy went through three years of "hell" after her mom's passing, where she experienced bulimia and turned to alcohol. I'm known as a thing that I'm not," she said, also admitting during the candid chat that she made the decision to "walk away" because she had to "for mental health and for overall peace." I was very different from the character I was playing. McCurdy went on to call her time as an actor "hellish," admitting the bold term "is not too intense of a word" as she confessed she never really identified with her squeaky clean characters. "I hear constantly that, 'You made my childhood,' and I think it's great that they had that experience, but that just was not my experience." She shared she found it "a difficult thing to say" because she knows how beloved the shows she starred in are to those who grew up watching them. "I was a famous 19-year-old and making a bunch of money and felt like I had everything at my fingertips, but I was deeply unhappy and I actually really resented my life," McCurdy admitted, referring to the "projects" she was working on as being the biggest source of unhappiness. "Hey guys – can we stop using facetune and other flaw-correcting apps to extremes? Instead of camouflaging our flaws and feeling ashamed, let's embrace our strengths and feel empowered," she wrote in the caption, urging her followers to share three things they like about themselves in the comments (via Earn The Necklace). The deleted snap showed McCurdy with an impossibly tiny waist and unnaturally smooth skin. McCurdy also addressed hateful social media messages from trolls with a powerful Instagram post in December 2015 when she purposefully edited her body in a dramatic way to make a point about unrealistic beauty standards. I was caught up in the whirlwind that is beauty." "I needed affirmation to feel comfortable. "I had a two-year span where I was so self-conscious and uncomfortable with my body that I would dress more provocatively to events and in photos because I looked to comments of praise to fulfill me and give me the confidence I lacked," she admitted. In a piece for The Wall Street Journal in 2014, she recalled seeing herself on a magazine cover but noticed it had edited her to such an extent she barely even recognized herself, which triggered her low self-esteem.
